my three babies

Tonight I was singing to Alex before he went to bed, and I sang this song to him, which I used to sing to him quite a lot when he was a baby.  It's really rather melancholy, but despite my joy at welcoming Alex, much of his infancy was desperately sad.  Brianna died when Alex was five weeks old.  I remember being up with him at night with him and the tears would slip down onto him while he nursed. 
But to me this song is also about the unconditional love of a mother for her children.

three babies
each of these
my three babies
I will carry with me
for myself
I ask no one else will be
mother to these three
and of course
I'm like a wild horse
but there's no other way I could be
water + feed
are not tools that I need
for the thing that I've chosen to be

in my soul
my blood + my bones
I have wrapped your cold bodies around me
the face on you
the smell of you
will always be with me

each of these
my three babies
I was not willing to leave
though I tried
I blasphemed + denied
I know they will be returned to me

each of these
my babies
have brought you closer to me
no longer mad like a horse
I'm still wild but not lost
from the thing that I've chosen to be
and it's 'cos you've thrilled me
silenced me
stilled me
proved things I never believed
the face on you
the smell of you
will always be with me.

              -Sinéad O'Connor